these additions from Angie

Lies My Mother Told Me
by Elizabeth Thomas

If you keep eating raw spaghetti
         you’ll get pinworms,
         then I’ll have to make
         a necklace of garlic for you to wear
         each night while you sleep,
         until they go away.
If you’re mean to your younger brother, I’ll know
         because I have a special eye
         that spies on you when I’m not home.
         You cannot hide from it,
         so don’t try.
If you touch your “down there”
         any time other than when using the toilet,
         your hand will turn green and fall off.
If you keep crossing your eyes
         they will stay that way
         until the wind
         changes direction.
It is bad luck to kill a moth. Moths are
         the souls of our ancestors and it just
         might be Papa paying a visit.
If you kiss a boy on the mouth
         your lips will stick together
         and he’ll use the opportunity
         to suck out your brains.
If you ever lie to me
         God will know and
         rat you out.
         And sometimes
         God exaggerates.
         Trust me —
         you don’t want that
         to happen.

I thoroughly enjoyed listening to this selection from the Writers Almanac earlier in the week.  To this list, I would add these additions from Angie:
1.  Eating the crusts on your bread will make you whistle better 
2.  Don't crack your knuckles, it will make them really big and ugly
3.  Only married women are allowed to use tampons

I'll stop there.  

Comments

[Chris]

❤

[SarahS]

My mother told me (as I'm sure her mother told her) that eating my bread crusts would make my hair shinier!

[Sharron Carleton]

Lovely the Angie additions...
( eating crusts in our family was to make your hair curly)
xox

[Joan]

OMG! I laughed till I cried when I read that list...some of those things were told to me by my grandmother and mother. The tampons one was one of those. Hilarious.
My mother used to tell my very much younger brothers that she could tell when they were lying because their ears turned red. NOT. But they didn't know any better.